An Esquimalt woman who was given her dream wedding after being told she had days left to live passed away on March 15, surrounded by family.
Kandace “Kandy” Musgrove was 39.
|Kandace “Kandy” and Donnie Musgrove on their wedding day February 15. (Courtesy of Donnie Musgrove)|
The last couple weeks of her life were hard, Kandy’s husband Donnie Musgrove said. She was no longer able to stand and would only be lucid once or twice a day. But not once was Kandy anything other than positive, he said.
“There was no anger in her, there was no bitterness,” Donnie said. “She never resented that she was dying.”
This was the way she lived her life – with unwavering positivity and gratefulness.
“Any opportunity she had to make someone a little more at ease, she did it,” he said. “She tried to teach what she lived.”
This is what he loved so much about her and what made them work so well despite the ups and downs of life.
In December 2019, Kandy was diagnosed with cervical cancer and, at first, it was something the couple thought they could overcome. Kandy underwent chemotherapy and they were expecting to be given the all clear last summer. Instead, it got worse. In November 2020, Kandy had her bladder removed and was told she had 18 months left to live.
The couple travelled to Tijuana, Mexico for nine weeks to seek alternative treatments. But when they returned home in February this year, Kandy had to be taken immediately to hospital. The cancer had spread everywhere and she was told she likely had days left to live.
|Kandace “Kandy” Musgrove with her four children on her wedding day. Left to right: Hunter, Kory, Kandy, Savana, Hailey. (Courtesy of Donnie Musgrove)|
It was then that the Greater Victoria community pulled together and threw Kandy and Donnie their dream wedding.
“It was absolutely perfect,” Kandy said, speaking to Black Press Media in February. “More than I ever could have imagined.”
The couple was lucky. Instead of days, they had weeks and they spent every possible moment of it together. Donnie said he only left the house twice between their wedding on Feb. 15 and Kandy’s death a month later.
Now, Donnie is trying to live every moment with the strength and optimism his wife did. He said her wish was that people take time in their day to be nicer to each other.
This spring, Donnie is planning on launching a charity to directly financially support cancer patients. It’s something he and Kandy dreamt up together.
Kandy lives on through her four children: Hunter (16), Kory (18), Savana (20) and Hailey (19). Along with Donnie’s four children – Timo (29), Gabriella (18), Alexander (12) and Callysta (8) – it’s a big family, but Donnie said it’s the furthest thing from a burden.
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