Throttle Therapy hits the road

Given that this is Britt Santowski's last Throttle Therapy for Black Press, she thought she’d leave you with her top 10 list for riders.

Everybody likes their top 10 lists. So, given that this is my last Throttle Therapy for Black Press, I thought I’d leave you with my own top 10.

10.When contemplating gear, consider holding a belt sander against your body at high speed. Next, think about what you want to have between you and that belt sander. Dress accordingly.

9. If you attend a motorcycle safety school, you WILL have nightmares about being caught riding without a helmet.

8.  If you’re a new rider, wait 10 years to get a second helmet. Then, you won’t have to say “No.”

7.  If you do take passengers, nothing says “I really really really hate you” more than letting your passenger wear shorts, sandals and a tank top.

6. Don’t tailgate. That passive-aggressive nonsense is okay if you’re in an 18 wheeler, your dog needs to pee, your cat’s in labour, and you’re a thousand miles away from the nearest vet. But when you are the most vulnerable traveller on the road, it’s much wiser to accept being delayed by a couple of minutes. Drop back, relax, and enjoy the ride.

5. Assume everyone else on the road is an idiot, assume they are all texting while driving, and assume they are out to get you. This will have you on your toes, always thinking of an escape plan.

4. Choose your riding buddies wisely, grasshopper. Make sure you are all either equally anal or all equally relaxed. A mis-match in riding aspirations is sure-fire way to ruin a good friendship.

3. If you’re a macho rider wanting the passenger to hang on tight because, um, it makes you feel good about yourself, kindness and honesty last longer. That quick-acceleration trick is lame. And temporary.

2. It’s okay to swear. Whatever is said inside your helmet with the visor down stays inside your helmet. Unless of course you have an intercom system. In which case, this is a top nine list for you.

1.  Wave. Dammit.

And that, my dear riding readers, is that. Keep your side stands up and the rubber side down.

Just Posted

Autism support dog helps Langford boy hold his head high

Family shares story for Autism Awareness Month

Give your immunity a boost for National Immunization Awareness Week

Immunize Canada calls on Canadians to stay up to date with their immunizations

Bear sightings historically rare in Langford: City staff

51 bear complaints or sightings in last year

Families hop over to Easter celebrations at Millstream Village

Annual Easter Eggstravaganza had lineups before 11 a.m.

Parishioners bear the weight of a large wooden cross on Good Friday

Good Friday Passion Procession winds through streets of Victoria

Victoria church bells toll in solidarity with Notre Dame Cathedral after devastating fire

Churches around the globe ring bells to honour iconic Paris cathedral

B.C. RCMP receive application for Police Cat Services

RCMP announced the launch of the Police Cat Services unit as an April fools joke

Kirkland Signature veggie burgers recalled due to possible metal fragments

Recalled products came in 1.7 kg packages with a best before date of Apr. 23, 2019

Parents of 13 who tortured children get life after hearing victims

One of their daughters fled their home and pleaded for help to a 911 operator

Flooding, climate change force Quebecers to rethink relationship with water

Compensation for victims of recurring floods limit to 50% of a home’s value, or a maximum of $100,000

Storms blast South, where tornadoes threaten several states

9.7 million people in the Carolinas and Virginia at a moderate risk of severe weather

Private cargo ship brings Easter feast to the space station

There are three Americans two Russians and one Canadian living on the space station

Notre Dame rector: “Computer glitch” possible fire culprit

The fire burned through the lattice of oak beams supporting the monument’s vaulted stone ceiling

B.C. senior sentenced for sexually abusing special-needs granddaughter

73-year-old Cortes Island man will go to jail for three years

Most Read