Ben Kilmer’s disappearance in May 2018 sparked a massive search. His body was found in October. The BC Coroners Service has confirmed that he died by suicide. (Citizen file)

Suicide confirmed in case of B.C. father who’d been missing for months

2018 disappearance sparked massive search for Ben Kilmer

Ben Kilmer, the Cobble Hill father of two whose body was found near the Chemainus River last October, died by suicide, the BC Coroners Service has confirmed.

Kilmer’s disappearance in May of 2018 sparked a massive search. His van had been found on the side of Old Lake Cowichan Road west of Duncan.

In the days and weeks that followed, dozens of volunteers conducted a ground search in the immediate area but there was no sign of the 41-year-old electrician. It wasn’t until Oct. 17 that a hiker discovered Kilmer’s body in a remote area near the Chemainus River.

Late last week, Tonya Kilmer asked the Chief Coroner, Lisa Lapointe, not to release graphic details of the cause of death for fear the information would be damaging to her two young children.

The Chief Coroner refused the request and on Monday afternoon the full report was sent to at least five parties that requested the document.

Kilmer had asked media outlets not to include the means or cause of death and it appears her request will be honoured.

“We have never published the details of a suicide before, and there is no public interest reason to start now,” Cowichan Valley Citizen editor Andrea Rondeau explained.

“While I think the public is entitled to information in this case, as the search for Ben Kilmer was highly public, it is enough to know that Ben Kilmer took his own life.

“While talking about suicide can be an important discussion for the community to have, knowing how someone killed themselves doesn’t really add to that discussion,” Rondeau said.

Scott Fee, news director at CHEK News in Victoria agreed the graphic details are no one’s business.

“We’re not going to dive into that, we’re not reporting that,” Fee confirmed on Monday.

CHEK posted a report early Monday afternoon and added a section relating to mental health issues and where resources to deal with mental illness can be accessed.

CBC’s reporting also refrained from reporting specific details.

After news of the imminent release of the report and Tonya Kilmer’s plea to the Chief Coroner was made public on Friday, the Citizen website and Facebook page was active with more than 130 people expressing their support for Kilmer.

Province-wide, hundreds of Black Press Media readers joined in the demand that the Chief Coroner only make a redacted report available.

If you feel like you are in crisis or are considering suicide, please call the Crisis Centre BC suicide hotline at 1-800-784-2433.

Other resources include: Canada Suicide Prevention Service at Toll free: 1-833-456-4566. You can also text 45645 or visit the online chat service at crisisservicescanada.ca.

Some warning signs include suicidal thoughts, anger, recklessness, mood changes, anxiety, lack of purpose, helplessness and substance abuse.

Get local stories you won't find anywhere else right to your inbox.
Sign up here

Just Posted

Metchosin inmate sentenced to 12 months in jail for escaping custody

Sentence to be served concurrent to a life sentence he was already serving

Sooke jumps on board to ban use of rat poison

City staff will educate residents on harmful effects of rodenticides

Sooke RCMP searching for two people, reported missing on Sept. 10

Alannah Brooke Logan, 20, and Beau Richard Santuccione, 32, last seen on Otter Point Road

Victoria man plans 30-hour walk to raise funds for vulnerable youth

Take a Hike engages youth in intensive, clinical counselling and outdoor experiential learning

West Shore pool stays closed for 2020

Juan de Fuca Recreation centre swimming could return in 2021

3 new deaths due to COVID-19 in B.C., 139 new cases

B.C. confirms 40 ‘historic cases,’ as well

Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg dies at 87

The court’s second female justice, died Friday at her home in Washington

Comox Valley protesters send message over old-growth logging

Event in downtown Courtenay was part of wider event on Friday

Application deadline for fish harvester benefits program extended

Those financially impacted by the pandemic have until Oct. 5 to apply

Emaciated grizzly found dead on central B.C. coast as low salmon count sparks concern

Grizzly was found on Gwa’sala-‘Nakwaxda’xw territory in Smith Inlet, 60K north of Port Hardy

VIDEO: B.C. to launch mouth-rinse COVID-19 test for kids

Test involves swishing and gargling saline in mouth and no deep-nasal swab

Young Canadians have curtailed vaping during pandemic, survey finds

The survey funded by Heart & Stroke also found the decrease in vaping frequency is most notable in British Columbia and Ontario

B.C. teachers file Labour Relations Board application over COVID-19 classroom concerns

The application comes as B.C.’s second week of the new school year comes to a close

CHARTS: Beyond Metro Vancouver, COVID-19 cases in B.C. haven’t increased much recently

COVID-19 case counts outside of Metro Vancouver have been level since July

Most Read